I sincerely feel a need and desire to share some of my thoughts and feeling about the gospel of Jesus Christ, which blesses my life continually. As you probably know, I am a Mormon. I think most people know because this as I try to be outward about my lifestyle choices, but it is not often that I really share the true magnitiude of blessing that the gospel has in my life, I often hint at it, but because I am not the best at sharing my feelings I seldom share my beliefs as a bold declaration because it is so close to my heart and especially recently I get emotional as I recognize more and more how loved and blessed I am by my Heavenly Father. However, I really think I should share this more, so I will give it a try. Please read this? I'm not trying to baptize you or anything. Just like you want to share an awesome new song or joke, I want to share the thing that brings me the greatest joy in my life.
I tell people all the time, "I do what I want." I sometimes wonder if people find this hypocritical because when they see me or classify me as "Mormon" they think of all the things that I "can't" do, like drinking, getting high, and participating in intercourse outside the bounds of marriage. However, in actuality, if I wanted to, I would be doing those things, the fact is I don't want to. Maybe you think I'm brainwashed or naive, but I know the blessings I've recieved from keeping these commandments, and I know that I am at my happiest when I am living the commandments of the gospel. If I start slipping on even the smallest things, like daily prayer and reading scriptures, I can feel the huge impact it makes in my life and in my closeness to Heavenly Father and my Savior Jesus Christ. What momentary satifcation could be worth living without that spirit for even a day? I can't think of even one.
To be perfectly honest though, even if all those blessings were taken out of the equasion, I am confident that I would still choose the lifestyle that I am living. Why? Well, to be perfectly honest my choices boil down to one man: my Savior, comforter, and redeemer.
I know that Jesus Christ suffered, died, and lives for all mankind, but also for me specifically. The atonement of Christ is infinite yet intimate. I have felt the blessings of the atonement in my life. There have been countless times when I have felt totally and utterly alone, gotten on my knees to pray, and immediately felt love, peace, and reassurance that I am never alone even if no one is standing by me. He gave everything for me, he lived and died for me, and all He and my Heavenly Father ask with all the love in the world are for me to make a few choices in my life to follow their teachings, which are all things we should do anyway and then on top of everything else, they bless us more for our choice to follow. With all the Savior has done for me, how can I not make the few small sacrifices He asks of me? When I put my Savior in the equasion, these choices hardly feel like sacrifices at all.
I live my life the way I do because I want to live the way my Heavenly Father and Savior have intructed me to. There is not an ounce of myself that regrets the way I've chosen to live my life, and something tells me there never will be. I know that The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints is true, because I have prayed about it and felt a confirming witness through the spirit. I feel that same spirit continually as I make righteous life choices, read the scriptures, pray, and attend church meetings and functions. I encourage anyone who has questions about the gospel to ask me or visit lds.org or mormon.org. Also, if you really don't understand why I love my life the way it is, I challenge you, no I triple dog dare you, to really live the way I do for even a week, and see the way it blesses your life. The best way to gain a testimony of a principle of the gospel is to apply it to your life. If you want to feel the joy that I feel, live the way that I do. Sometimes it is hard, but it is always worth it. Everything I do, I do because it brings me closer to returning to my Father in Heaven and there is not instant gratification or worldy pleasure that could ever outweigh the oppurtuinity of building and developing that relationship.
I know that Heavenly Father and our Savior love you and that you are a child of God. If you don't know that, pray until you do. I know that our Savior died for you, so you could return to live with the Father. If you don't know that, pray until you do. I know that God has a plan for you. If you don't know that, pray until you do. He will answer your prayers. I know this with assurity because He answers mine.
I love each of you and wish you all happiness in the coming New Year.
Today, I realized that I am actually a little bit brave sometimes. Hopefully, this gives you a laugh.
Today, I stayed home sick. It wasn't a huge deal, just a miserable cough, the kind that feels like someone is cutting at your throat everytime you breathe. So I wussed out of school and slept most of the day, trying to ignore my pounding head and sniffly nose. In the afternoon, I was watching some Netfllix and lounging on a chair in the living room. It was the middle of the day when Dad walked upstairs in a gym outfit, said he'd be back in a bit, and walked out the door. Sometime later, I heard a beep down the hallway, followed by the electronic voice that said, "Basement Door Open," as I heard the basement door open and shut. "It's just Dad," I let myself believe, for a split second, until the door opened and closed again, at which point I looked out the window and thought a number of things simultaneously..
1) Dad's car was not at home.
2) A robber wouldn't come in our house at such a busy time of day (quickly followed by..)
3) it was not a busy time of day, our cars were gone, and it wasn't normal for me to be at home
[think Home Alone 3 here folks...]
4) Is Bella in the basement? Did they come in, take her, and leave?
At thought #4, I immediately sprang from my seat, grabbed the nearest weapon-usable item near me (which was a metal broom), and started to go towards the basement not sure of what I was doing...
that is, until dad walked upstairs and I realized that mom had his car, so he hadn't actually gone anywhere...
Feeling a little embarressed, I returned to my Netflix watching.
However, looking back on my day I have realized something. Even though, I was in no real danger, I seriously was convinced there was a robber/kidnapper in my basement (i'll blame this logic on sleep deprivation from sickness) and even though I was sure someone was down there, I wasn't go to sit around and wait for something to happen or hide from what was coming. Evidentally, when faced with danger and the option of fight or flight, I instictively choose to fight, which is not something that people would likely assume about me, or that I would assume about myself, but on reflection has been true for most of my life. Hopefully, this doesn't ever get me into trouble someday, but admitidly i'm just a little but proud of it.
So there you go. The story of how I almost hit my dad with a broom thinking he was a robber/kidnapper, because obviously that's the only logical explanation for the basement door opening...
This blogpost was inspired by a meme created by my brother. The meme was inspired by the Biebs and by #TeamKeepAlyssaSingle (represent).
Anyways, I think just about everyone knows about my rebellious act of teenage defiance... that is, refusing to get a boyfriend despite my mom's requests. hahaha Ignoring all that, I thought I'd do a post about some of the requirements I would have for my someday boyfriend. I don't think they're unreasonable because I don't expect him to be perfect, but here's the list (this is not a marriage requirement list...).
-He has to smell good.
-He has to make me laugh.
-He has to think I'm beautiful.
-He has to jam in the car with me whether he can sing or not.
-He has to dance with me, no matter how ridiculous we look.
-He has to ball with me, even if every shot is an airball. -He has to be a gentleman, but he can still tease me.
-He has to plan things sometimes, it can't always be me.
I mean there are other things that are important to me, but as far as key requirements for a boyfriend, these are my top prereqs. I feel like this list makes me pretty low maintenance, but if you don't think so I guess we just won't work out! (; just kidding... sorta, that sounded too cocky.
I love music a lot, and quite a variety of it too.
This is easily reflected by the CD I burned of music to play while I'm driving in my car..
I love to jam guys. For real tho.
I hope all the versions I post are clean like the versions I play in my car.
So far this music has been a sucess, especially when I'm driving my little sisters around.
1. Kiss Me Through The Phone- Soulja Boy.
2. The Perfect Scene- Mercy Mercedes
3.Catastrophe- Four Year Strong
4. Radioactive- Imagine Dragons
5. Bangarang- Skrillex
6. Payphone- Maroon 5
7. Shiver Me Timbers- Mercy Mercedes
8. Sweet Tangerine- The Hush Sound
9. Cinema- Benny Benassi (Skirllex Remix)
10. Hallelujah- Paramore
11. Right Here- HeyHiHello
12. I Wish- One Direction
13. On Top of the World- Imagine Dragons
14. Domino- Jessie J
15. Something Left To Give- The Starting Line
16. First of the Year (Equinox)- Skrillex
17. Violins and Trees- The Morning Of
18. I Knew You Were Trouble- Taylor Swift
...I posted a video of this in my last post.
19. Sway Your Head- We Shot The Moon
20.Simple Life- My Favorite Highway
21. Love Like Woe- The Ready Set
22. As Long As You Love Me Dubstep Remix... I can't remember the Artist. and Justin Bieber
Recently I've noticed that there's a lot about people we don't see. I mean, that's really obvious, but when it comes down to it, we are virtually surrounded by people that we know almost nothing about. Not just strangers.. which there are definitely more than enough of, but people that we talk to everyday. How much to we really know about our classmates? It makes me sad how little I know about the people who surround me. It becomes far too easy to make assumptions about people who we know little about, and we're all guilty of judging others more than we should, including myself. Anyway, I decided to make a little list of things about myself that people don't know. I'm just a regular girl, but I'm me, and these are some of the things that make me who I am. So here we go... Facts About Me:
1) My name is Alyssa Joy Brown, and I am named after my grandmother. Other than Jesus Christ, she is basically the epitome of charity, and I hope that someday I can be giving and selfless like her. I try to live by my middle name in every area of my life. I believe we can choose joy in our life.
2)Speaking of my grandma, I love my grandparents a lot. I love hearing their words. They have such interesting stories, and it makes me sad that they could die with them. I cherish the time I get to spend with them, because I'm lucky to have them in my life and I don't know how long they'll be here.
3) I like to eat mangoes with lime and chili powder. It is basically the best way to eat them.
4) I dress for comfort not style. It's actually kind of nice because if I put any effort whatsoever into an outfit, I get instant recognition. Looking really good is on of the few things for which I don't hold myself to a high standard. Occasionally, if I bother with it, I can maybe pull off looking good.
This is a day that I actually bothered versus basically every other normal day of my life. Every other day of my life I am a jeans, tshirt, hoodie, moccasin, and (if I can swing it) bandanna kinda gal. Check my swag.
5) I'm not actually a huge fan of chocolate, but I like it in certain forms, mainly brownies and hot cocoa.
6) I love things about every season, but my favorite are summer and fall. Summer for the memories and fall for the actual things of the season, like colorful leaves and the scent of the cold brisk air.
7) I really like to take pictures, quite a lot. I feel like if I really tried I could go somewhere with it one day, but I really just want to cultivate it as a skill so I can take picture of my kids someday. I can't wait.
8) I have wanted to go to BYU since I was in the fourth grade. I really hope I get to be a cougar next year!
9) I love to cook. I am really good at it too. I can follow a recipe or make up my own. That's part of the reason why I love pinterest. I can always find awesome recipes. When I'm a mom, I will always have homemade bread in the house. I want to learn how to make lots of things from scratch because I believe it always tastes better that way. I love food a lot.
10) I am ballin'. hahaha Really though, I love to play basketball. I may not be fabulous, but I've probably got a lot more game than you would thing just by looking at me. I love to play for fun though, I'm not actually competitive. One of my favorite parts of church basketball is playing with new girls and watching them grow.
11) I'm actually really good at a lot of things, but I'll rarely admit it because I can't stand when people are cocky or overconfident. Here are a few things that I'm good at, not saying that I'm the best in the world, but whatever...
12) I'm a pretty good singer, and that makes me feel great. This year I got ranked 3rd Alto 1 in the state of Virgina out of all the Seniors who auditioned for honors choir. That was a cool moment, but it's nothing compared to the little joys I find when I sing. For example, today in english we sang happy birthday to Sean Buchanan and at the end I did just the smallest most simple descant, but afterwards Michael turned to me with the most awed expression and said I sounded like an angel. It was the smallest comment, but it totally made my day. Honestly, I just enjoy singing. Music is so powerful and singing is such a source of joy. Like today when I took my sister to get her cello we sat in the car and totally jammed. It was such a great moment to share together. As an aside, if you need an awesome song to jam out to, try this one which we used today:
13)I am also pretty good at writing in different fonts. It may sound like a lame talent, but I really like it. It's like my own form of art. Some people love the sound of their own voice, I love the look of my writing on a page.
14) I know I already did a fact about photography, but I didn't tell you that I'm pretty good at it. I mean, I am not anything fabulous, but I do enjoy looking at a moment frozen in time and thinking "I captured that." I have a pretty good eye for it too. After my uncle's wedding, when we printed the photo's I took at CVS this gave my mom a release form to sign saying that she had permission to print professionally taken photos so they wouldn't be liable. She said they were suprised when she said, "My daughter took these..." Here are a few pictures I've taken, they may not be incredible, but they are noteworthy in my book... (actually I wrote that and realized I am on my mom's laptop, so umm... here are some semi good ones from facebook and some otherday I'll post some of my really noteworthy photos...)
...someday I'll have to post some of my really good ones, but I like those a lot, for different reasons, even though some of them don't actually illustrate my photography skills.
15) I am a fan-freaking-tastic cook. For example, as I type this I am making a roast beef (like real roast beef, not strips from the deli) with homemade mashed garlic potatoes. I do this all by myself. Check my swag. Ask me and someday we can hangout while I cook you food. I love to cook for people. It brings me joy. (: ...so does baking.
16) I really really really love fresh fruits and veggietables. I especially love veggies, but some with qualifiers. For example, I only like collard greens when my mom makes them and I will eat tomatoes in general, but I don't really like them unless they're from a farm or nearby garden. Corporate tomatoes taste different and I don't like it.
17) I think having a celebrity crush is weird. I mean, they are cute and all, but I know plenty of cute guys in real life too. I think girls just immortalize them, and then overlook all the great guys around them. I try not to judge, but some girls fan majorly hard over people and it getscreepy how much they know about them... just saying.
18) I have a natural tendency to love people and overlook their faults. Even if I really don't like someone I'll try to give them the benefit of the doubt or I can at least find about them that I like.
19) The only thing I believe in more than goal setting is goal getting. The other day a guy in church said that out smallest goals can become our greastest triumphs. Life is about making the most of it. You;re life is up to you and only you. So hop to it.
20) I am a complete sucker for lame/cheesy movies, especially Christmas movies or chick flicks. I can usually guess the end within the first 10 minutes, but I still watch them. Go ahead and judge me.
21) I like to joke around a lot. I'll banter with you back and forth. I can take a joke, and I sure can deal them out. However, the moment I can't tell if you're kidding, all bets are off, I'm done.
23) I am in a constant state of awe at the beauty of the world. Even the most regular things like a blue sky or fall leaves take my breathe away. God gave us such a beautiful world!
This photo is of a regular blue sky taken through the sun roof of a car I was in...
This was one of the many breathtaking sights in Utah.
This was one of the gorgeous Oregon sunsets I experience.
If you see the white spot in the ocean (down and to the left of the sun) it is actually a whale blowing water.
Isn't the world wonderful?
24) While I am a very open person, I have secrets just like anyone else.
25) I believe in scars and dysfunctional familys.
26)If you think I have a crush on you, you're wrong. (this does not apply to approximately .000003% of people in the United States and that including every boy I've even kinda liked since the beginning of the school year, not even necessarily now...) People tend to mistake me being nice to a boy for me liking them. Guys (and girls who like to start rumors), can I be honest? Just because I don't have/haven't ever had a boyfriend, because I'm not the prettiest or skinniest, and because I talk to lots of guys does not mean that I am totally desperate and in love with every guy that I talk to... because we all know girls like that, but I am not one. To be frank, I am female, so I can have pretty crazy days, but I think most guys I know would agree that I'm pretty chill compared to most girls (at least on the outside). Let's not mess that up. Just because I smile at you or ask how you're day is going doesn't mean I have a crush on you in the slightest, I just try to be nice. So stop acting like a girl and chill, let's be friends. (:
27) I am astounded at all the blessings I enjoy. I am so grateful for almost everything in my life (and I'm working to be grateful for everything). I am so blessed. I love my life regardless of my trials.
28) I cry a lot more than I should, but sometimes it's all I need to get back on my feet and walk forward with my head held high. Sometimes I feel down, but when it comes down to it, I won''t let anyone stop me.
29) There are things that I don't like about myself like, my weird eyebrows, my weight, that I can be super irritating, or that I can get easily irritated, but I still know that I am important and beautiful in my own way, just like everyone else. Yes, I have pretty eyes, a decent smile, and silky hair, but more importantly I can make people smile and laugh (regarldess of how lame my jokes are), I care about everyone even people that I don't really like, and I know who I am and where I want to go.
30) I'm a thug. Accept it.
Obviously that whole challenge thing didn't work out. I'd rather just talka bout what I want to talk about. To be perfectly honest, I didn't even forget to write these I just haven't taken the time to do it. Instead of doing it I'm just going to choose the ones that I want to do the most and do them all here now :D
Day 3- Views on Alcohol and Drugs!
Well this is a good one. I think both are stupid. That is that.
People can say "you won't know until you try" all they want, but I know that I don't want to try.
I have many reasons for this, but here is just one.. my body is a temple and I want to take care of it.
Day 4- Religion!
I am a Mormon! http://mormon.org/me/9CZY <--- this is me! Check it out!
I think my religion is a wonderful thing and I could do a hundred blogposts on this, but today I'll just say that it makes me happy. I tell people all the time "I do what I want," and sometimes I think some people who know my beliefs roll their eyes a little when I say that, they seem to thing I'm all talk because my religion is "restrictive." I know some teenage Mormons who certainly feel that way, but I'm not lying, I do what I want. I live the gospel because I want to no one makes me. If I didn't want to live the standards of the gospel I wouldn't, but I always will and no one can stop me. My beliefs make me happier than anything. I am so blessed. I am a Mormon, I know it, I live it, I love it.
Day 12- Bullet Your Whole Day
-Got Up and Pulled Myself out of bed.
-Got dressed in comfy clothes
-Got Gabriel Up
-Drove to seminary
-Played Scripture Mastery Basketball
-Drove to school
-Talked to Lexy and turned in my parking permit info
-Went to Calculus
-Took the car keys to the office because dad needed the car
-Went to Troubadours! [STARTED RELUCTANT DRAGON! :D]
-Ate Lunch
-Faxed my report card to the insurance company
-Went to concert choir and sang stuff
-Kendall was a boss and gave me a ride home, love that kid, it was a ballin' time.
-Watched an episode of ONCE with Ben
-Ate Fruit Loops
-considered buying a camera
-watched Sleepless in Seattle while I cleaned the living room
-made cookies for daddy with Bella
^^Played Guitar and watched her dance while they cooled (:
-Got on the computer, turned on pandora, decided to blog.
Lastly I will do, 5 famous guys who are attractive. ...that did not sound like what I meant to say, but now it's funny so I am not going to edit it...
This was the only one that came to mind, mostly because the other day I was reading online and found out that he likes girls who can put away food. I love food so that's necessary. ..and that's basically it.
I will probably come back and do more of these someday just as regular blogposts because they are pretty good topics that I wouldn't mind talking about.
In ten years, I will be 27 years old, but I won't be at all worried about the fact that I'm approaching thirty, because I'll know I've done everything to make the most of the life I've been given. I'll have graduated from college and I'll be doing work to make the world a cleaner, safer, and more beautiful place for future generations. I'll most likely be married and raising a family. I'll be healthy and happy, always trying to do what's right and be my best self.
So obviously I don't post on this blog very frequently. The fact is, I want to post on it all the time, so I try to use it as a motivation for doing other things, like, if I do my homework then I can blog... the problem is that this never actually works. I either don't accomplish anything, or I fall asleep or something. ....this is my lame excuse for not blogging. However, I have a solution! I'm going to do this challenge, so I can justify doing quick posts daily!
So here's for Day 1:
I'm currently very single. In fact, I've never had a day when I wasn't single. IN FACT, I am #TeamKeepAlyssaSingle. Really, I think high school relationships are a waste of time, so I am currently not participating, I might someday change my mind, but I am fine where I am now. :D
Check out some of the #TeamKeepAlyssaSingle Memes that my brother, @Browntosaurus_B made!
Many of you who know me, know that I have a strong desire to serve a mission.
I can remember being 11 years old, praying fervently to ask if serving a mission would be the right choice for me, and I can remember feeling that a mission would be the right choice. I remember anytime I started to wonder if it was still the right choice I'd have an experience that would remind me why I wanted to go. Pretty soon, there was no doubt in my mind. I even told my bishop in an interview. He said something about "in case you ever decide to serve a mission..." and I interjected, "I've already decided and I'm going." He sort of smiled, encouraged me, and advised me to get a cop of Preach My Gospel (which I of course already had! :D).
His repsonse was fairly different than the responses that others gave to me. So many people would say to me, "Oh Alyssa, you say that now, but you know you might want to get married before then!" Sometimes I would shrug them off or smile and laugh, but as I became more confident about the decision I would illustrate my determination, I am going to serve a mission I would tell them, "no matter what." I knew of the confirmation I had felt. I know that God has a plan for me, and for sometime I've known that my plan involves a mission.
Especially within the past year, the idea of serving a mission has been a great source of joy, and it still is! I get so excited at the idea of serving a mission! It has been especially exciting as my friends prepare to serve missions. I remember talking to (now) Elder Smith at our Waterworks Orientation about serving missions! He told me, "Today is the first day I can put in my mission papers!" He was obviously exstatic as he asked me if I thought it would be too soon to ask President Price if his papers had been sent. I couldn't help but laugh fully understanding his enthusiasm. I remember when he talked about how much he couldn't wait, and I told him I didn't know how I could possibly wait 4 years! It seemed so long, but I was determined to prepare myself for something I desired so greatly. I remember saying, "I feel like a teenager when I say that I cannot wait to turn 21, but I want to for such different reasons. I just want to serve a mission!"
As many of my friends submitted their papers, we'd talk about wondering where they were going, and I couldn't help wondering where I would go in four years! I wanted to badly to leave sooner. I would fantasize about the idea of them letting me go at an early age for some special program because I wanted to go soooo badly! (Sometimes I would even worry that I would find a husband and find out that the mission I would be called on was a couples mission when I'm old, which would be awesome, but I was already dying to serve. How many Mormon girls do you know who worry about finding a husband too soon? Anyway...) Everytime I felt the spirit, or heard a good talk, or spoke to a soon-to-be, serving, or current missionary my desire to leave increased! I would feel giddy at the idea of sharing the gospel and serving the Lord. It has been such a central desire in my life for such a long time.
In case I haven't illustrated this: I WANTED TO SERVE A MISSION MORE THAN ANYTHING! Waiting four years felt like such a trial, I would pray for guidance and strength, and I always felt a sense of comfort. I knew it was His plan, that things would workout the way they needed to and that I just had to have faith and keep my sights on my goal for the coming years.
Then today a historic announcement was made during General Conference... President Monson talked about how in certain countries missionaries were allowed to leave at age 18 because of special circumstances. These missionaries worked out so well that the church wanted to make it so that all young men could leave at age 18. I held my breath wondering if there would be a change for young women. I didn't dare hope for it, I thought, maybe they'll let us go when we're twenty? Then the life-changing announcement was make:
"Young Women Can Leave On Their Missions When They Are: 19!"
I started crying with a smile as big as the sky on my face. I was elated. I can serve a mission for the church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints in 1 year and about 3 months. That means I could be on my mission before many of my friends currently on their missions come home. I cannot wait to go and the idea of going sooner was just too much, not to mention the amazing conference and addresses that followed the news. The world is changing my friends, and I am going to serve a mission. However, I will add this. The change has been made, but it is up to each individual to pray and decide for themselves when or if they will go. If I pray about this and feel prompted that I shouldn't go yet, I will wait. I will still wait until I am twenty one, but I will be serving a mission, you can count on it. (:
I would like to end this post with my testimony. I know that this is the gospel of Jesus Christ restored upon the earth today. I know that we are God's children, He knows and loves us individually, and He has a plan for each of us. If we live worth of the spirit, we can have personal revelation to guide and help us in our lives. I know that God hears and answers our prayers. I know that the one true way to eternal happiness is through living the gospel, and there is nothing on this world worth losing the eternal blessing of Heaven that we recieve through living our lives according to God's plan. I know that the Book of Mormon is the world of God. Read it. It will change your life. I know that Families are central to God's plan and that we can live together forever as families! I know that Christ suffered for our sins as well as our sufferings. We can always have hope because of him, and we are never alone because He has experience every trial we will encounter. Most of all, I know that if you want to know that any of these things are true and you sincerely ask God, He will confirm these things to you, just as He has for me. Take the chance and ask him, your life will never be the same. This is His church and His gospel. My life wouldn't be the same without it. You can be happy if you live the gospel.
Somehow, I've managed to have two awesome weekends in a row! In fact, perhaps this is too bold, but I believe I am finally beginning to have... a life. That's it! I said it! I should have cleaned my room a long time ago. hahaha, that comment was thrown in there for mom's sake. I knew long ago the benefits of cleaning my room, I was just lazy.
Anyways, I got to do more fun and awesome things this weekend!
So, Leggo!
Friday night, I went to the Forest Park/Hylton Football games. It was an awesome game... for the bulldawgs. haha Before the game started, I saw my friend Kevin and he asked if we were ready to lose. Now all I can do is laugh.
Anyways, I went with Austin, Lexy, and Zosia, and once we were there we met up with Hunter. We sat on the Hylton side and had fun talking and watching the game. At some point towards the end of halftime, we went to go and get concessions. I felt really bad because I stopped to talk to Mrs Francis and assumed they had left me, but then when I walked away they were dutifully waiting for me to return. My poor friends are so patient.
Anyways, after they got food, we played a game where you flip a powerade bottle in the air, in such a way that it lands straight up. I throw this tid bit into this post because I did it with Hunter's bottle. Can you say boss? well thank you, I am. Just kidding. But yeah, I was a little proud.
Anyways, Hylton smashed Forest Park, and it was awesome. That's basically it. (:
Saturday, I spent the morning cleaning and powerwashing the front porch, and then afterwards doing some calc and physics homework. Fear not dear friends, this was not the climax of my weekend.
After much hard work I got to go to Aidan's house, with Hunter and Austin. We and a group of other youth went to IKEA and played sardines. Highlights included a cinnamon roll toast and carrying the boys to the waterfountain. Not to mention our twine fight. I feel like this weekend could be the start of fun friendships, but I don't know if they are ready for that. lol. I really enjoyed myself though. After IKEA we went to a bonfire at Aidan's and then went to Martin's house randomly. It was great.
I have a lot of thoughts running through my head right now that I want to share. However, I also don't want to or can't so I think I will stop here before my head gets the better of me.
For English we had to write a personal narrative, to share some person, event, or moment of our lives that has made the most impact. All I could think was, tell them about the gospel. I kept trying to push the feeling off not knowing where to start, but I knew I couldn’t deny it. The gospel of Christ is the most Important thing I have, and I love it too much not to share. Really the gospel has effected me in everyway, but I can think of three decisions I had to make in order to really improve myself, so I decided they would be my focus points. For some reason, the idea of writing this to you, to tell you more about myself is easier than just writing it, so that’s what I’ve decided to do. I hope you enjoy it. I hope it makes you smile. Mostly, I hope it conveys my love of the gospel as it develops.
Please note, I will not admit to whom that message was written.... (;
So here is my essay. I go through phases of loving and hating it. Here we go:
**please note. I think I edited this since the file I have on this computer, but I'm not going to fix it, so please self edit as you read...
So, sometime last year, I wrote a post called, #ThingsIWishICouldSay.
It was a compilation of thoughts to random people, by me.
All were my honest thoughts that I knew I would probably never share.
Today I have more of these thoughts, but they are all about one boy.
To illustrate how crazy I am, please note that this is not a boy I am romantically involved with, or (so far) even interested in being anything more than friends with... I just think about people a lot.
-I hope you're not as miserable as you seem to be.
-I just want to be here for you. It seems like you can't tell anyone how things really are.
-I know things suck right now, but let them get better. Have hope.
-I feel like I've found things out and invaded your privacy, but I didn't mean to and I can't change it.
-I won't tell anyone the things I know, in case they are secrets.
-Why did you lie to me? What did I do to deserve your distrust?
-I keep feeling like you're going to hate me. I just want to be friends.
-I don't want you to feel alone. I've been there. It sucks.
-Give yourself a chance to be happy. Things aren't as bad as they seem now.
-I think we've had fun together, but the memories are tainted.
-Everytime I remember, I'm bothered that you lied to me. It was such a small lie. It shouldn't matter.
-You are a typical Simba. -I hope one day you'll realize just how much you're capable of. -I believe in you. I want you to be happy. I wish that was enough.
This weekend was beyond incredible, just what I needed.
On Friday, (with a little struggle) I managed to clean my room. It was tough because, I'm honestly a little bit of a slob, especially in the summer where I am always either: working, out of town, working, taking care of school things, working, at church, working, hanging out with friends, or exausted from working. hahaha. Anyways, needless to say I haven't been taking care of things the way I should, and I had 3 months worth of junk piled up. Luckily, not I can turn over a new leaf because I finally got it all done!
Anyways, I got to go to a sleepover at the lovely Lexy Rowberry's house, along with Clarky and later Lauren Brown! We used to have all sorts of sleepovers, but haven't had one in over a year. I was more than needed. I'm so glad that I finally got to go have a night with my girls, the ones who are there for me, through thick and thin!
Here are some examples of sleepovers past, some of the best nights of my lifeee. (:
First and Foremost... (best sleepover ever...)
Tricked you! This actually was at a sleepover, but not one of the ones that I wanted to share and relive with my best friends :D hahhahaha
ANYWAY...
Years of memories of building forts, trampoline talks, and funny adventures doing all sorts of shenanigans have been flooding back and we've really missed all of our time together!
Sadly, Kenzie couldn't make it, but that's okay, it really just gives us an excuse for another sleepover someday!
We started off by eating dinner and chatting it up on the trampoline. Then when Lauren arrived we did the same thing. Then we ate brownies with ice cream! yummm. Then we watched the Woman in Black. Apparently, it was really really scary for Lexy and Carly. It wasn't very scary, I kept falling asleep. I woke up, saw a few semi scary events, and then Lexy and Carly suddenly... screamed bloody murder! ahhh, it was freaking scary, to hear them scream. I jumped up so badly.
Afterwards we played games and hung out for awhile. We stayed up til about 4 chatting it up. It was so nice to spend time with them again, to feel bonded with girls who have standards and live their lives the way they know that they should. It was incredibly uplifting.
Saturday, my morning plans were cancelled, so I had plenty of time to do my chores and my homework! It was a very productive day!
I also had one other excursion on Saturday! I got to go to my cousins house, you know: Lauren, Anthon, Tara, and Jaden's house in Manassas (; We had a cookout and spent time together. It was mostly for their family, but a few family friends were invited, including me! It was incredibly fun. It felt like being with my family. We had a great time! :D The kids had the most intense battle going when we arrived. It was hilarious. I called it, Call of Duty: Operation Treehouse. hahaha Seriously, I was impressed. We ate great food, hung out, danced, ate food, and talked it up! I have missed all of them so much, and I really enjoyed meeting more of their family and spending time with friends! It was a blast. Also, highlights: teaching kids the spoons game (poor Anthon!), using Summer as an ankle weight, and watching the BYU game with Anthon and Uncle Jay Jay commentating. I really enjoyed my night.
Then I got to enjoy a lovely drive home with Aunty Ann! We talked about a lot of things that I really appreciated and some things I've been thinking about. I'll write about them in my journal, but not here. Sorry!
Then of course Sunday was a blast! We had an incredible Sacrament Meeting, not to mention a lovely Sunday School and YW Lesson.
This weekend was just the pick me up I needed to not only survive, but thrive in the coming school week! It may be bold to say this on a Monday, but I think I got this guys, I am going to make it! (:
Everytime I want to write a post (which is often) I tell myself I have to do something productive first like, clean my room or do homework or some nonsense like that.
Since those are things I don't like I end up procrastinating them in a less productive way then blogging, like, wondering what it would be like to have a life.
That was a joke, in case you couldn't tell.
These days no one can tell when I am joking.
Anyway, back to the matter at hand, which is: to write a blog post. Just for you! :D
First, I want to pause to write about Oregon! I had an awesome time, and I would write all about it, but I already did here. "Olive Our Joy" is the blog I am running with Lexy. Our feet are currently on the ground, but we are not yet running. We will be on our way soon, but check out the Oregon post and then someday soon, check out all the awesome things we will be posting on there!
Today, as I got onto blogger I had no idea what I would be writing about, so much has been going on, and as you can probably tell, I am great at talking about almost anything, but I am going to write about writing.
You see, in school, they make us write, a lot. Crazy concept right?
I've realized that as good at writing as I am, I'm actually bad at it. Forget the fact that I got a 5 on my AP exam, that means nothing. Sense the end of summer I have been having some serious writers block about everything, except maybe texts to Lexy. My brain just feels off and I can't think straight the way I used to when I write.
Over the past couple english classes we've been reading some of Elbow's advice on writing with power. (Aside: best last name ever. for real though.)
A few things stuck out to me. His writing is on the effect an audience has on your writing.
First, I suck at compulory writing. Well, not really. I suck at compulsory writing when I can't find a way to connect about it or be passionate about what I am writing. I have to really have an opinion about things if I am going to write a paper on it. To me, time is an investment. I invest myself in things that I care about.
Secound, he talked about how writing to a particular individual can cause you to be blocked. I think this is what is happening to me in my AP 12 class. I think I have too many opinion about people in that class to write anything that they might end up reading. We read a piece called "All Writing is Autobiographical" and that work made me realize that I don't really want any of them to know anything about me. It's a problem.
For example, we are working on a personal narrative that we have to read in front of the class. Public speaking is not a big deal to me. I actually enjoy it. Especially on an assigned topic where I write down exactly what I plan to say and read it to the class. piece of cake. I've done this my whole life. However, no matter how many times I sit down to write it, I freeze. I don't want these people to know about me and things I care about, but unless I write a passionate paper that really says something, my work will be figurative crap. It's a little bit of a catch 22. I can't write unless I care, and I can't write to them about something I care for.
See my dilemma?
Well, fear not. Elbow offers a solution. Either write to no one or write to someone who loves to read the things you are writing. I'm not sure how this will work out when I know I have to read it. Today I work an awesome short story in class because reading was an option so I knew they would never see it. However, I can't exactly lie to myself. I'm going to have to write my paper for or to someone. The question is: Who?
On a related note: I'm pretty sure I'm going to write about my struggle between chosing fear and faith.
That's all for now! Bet you're like, "It doesn't seem like you have a writing ptoblem, Alyssa!"
This is more like word vomit. Let it come, don't stop it, hope it doesn't make someone throw up.
I am amazed at how quickly this summer has flown by! I know a lot of people who complain about it going too slow and how they just wish school would start/time would go faster. NO! Summer is going at a quick pace, often quicker than I'd like it to. Okay, I'll admit one or two features rotations have gone a little slower than I'd like, but I can deal! It's really okay with me! I just want summer to last. I'm totally making this summer count. The way it should.
This summer has been filled with so much and there's still more to come! No slow empty August for this girl!
Check it: (Summer Checklist) (hahaha, get it? check it! ...that one wasn't even intentional! :D)
[X]Girls' Camp 2012 (my first last!)
[X]Sibling Week
[X]Hardcore Lifeguarding
[X]Sibling Week with Gabe! (aka, party all week!)
[X]Youth Conference/Youth Celebration
[X]EFY with Lexy, Lauren, and Kenz
[X]Family Dance Party
[ ]Troub Camp
[ ]Oregon Trip
[ ]Freshman Orientation
and i didn't even mention things like the 4th of July or all my summer assignments! also, hardcore lifeguarding basically occurs anytime that I'm still in Woodbridge.
Also, I can't wait for Ben to come home.
The End
there are so many posts that I keep wanting to make that require time and effort. well, mostly they require me using the other computer for photos. anyways, i'll hopefully make those posts someday, but for now I'm going to stop putting off blogging and just do those whenever i have the time.
THE END
No really, that's all I've got.
If I'm going to talk about something else I have to do a different blogpost.
Because I'm weird. :D
So I've been a little loose about posting lately. There have been so many things that I've meant to write about and didn't find the time to do. I do use the internet, just not often on the computer. The problem is that I don't like typing on my iPod. Regardless, I'm posting now. (:
So this post is kinda random about a few things that happened before camp.
For one, Jessica said, (and this is a quote about an attractive male I know), "Mmmm, he can bake cookies in my oven! ...when I'm married"
To this Gabe replied, "Well.. I'm leaving" Then the little girls said they wanted cookies.
Furthermore, my mom told me to get a boyfriend.
The quote was, "Alyssa, go get a boyfriend." She also added, "...so you'll stop bothering me!"
Since then (post camp) several conversations surrounding the topic of me having a boyfriend have occurred. Most hilarious to everyone, but me, until like 20 minutes later when I did find it funny. Also, in case anyone is wondering I don't have plans to get a boy friend anytime soon (despite my parent's blessing...) unless something changes drastically in which case, you'll find out first. Well, you'll find out eventually. In any case, here are some of the quotes included in these conversations for your enjoyment: "Actually I really wouldn't mind if you decided you want a boyfriend!" "ALYSSA CANNOT HAVE A BOYFRIEND!" "Now we know why mom wants Alyssa to get a boyfriend." "No Alyssa, the order is boyfriend, marriage, then babies."
^^^for the record, I was in no way disputing this. "As long as he keeps both hands on the wheel" "Lets pull out our For Strength of Youth Pamphlets!" "Just hurry up and clean your room so you can have a boyfriend."
I sincerely feel a need and desire to share some of my thoughts and feeling about the gospel of Jesus Christ, which blesses my life continually. As you probably know, I am a Mormon. I think most people know because this as I try to be outward about my lifestyle choices, but it is not often that I really share the true magnitiude of blessing that the gospel has in my life, I often hint at it, but because I am not the best at sharing my feelings I seldom share my beliefs as a bold declaration because it is so close to my heart and especially recently I get emotional as I recognize more and more how loved and blessed I am by my Heavenly Father. However, I really think I should share this more, so I will give it a try. Please read this? I'm not trying to baptize you or anything. Just like you want to share an awesome new song or joke, I want to share the thing that brings me the greatest joy in my life.
